FRIAR FRANCIS: Did I not tell you she was innocent?

LEONATO: So are the prince and Claudio, who accused her
Upon the error that you heard debated:
But Margaret was in some fault for this,
Although against her will, as it appears
In the true course of all the question.

ANTONIO: Well, I am glad that all things sort so well.

   —Much Ado About Nothing, Act V, Scene IV

Went to the doctor yesterday for my heartburn, and he said I had a “classic case of acid reflux.” That’s not the greatest news in the world, in that I’ll probably have to deal with this on and off for the rest of my life now, but I am happy to hear that it’s classic. There’s a clear program for dealing with it. I’ve had some other things where the doctors aren’t quite sure what’s going on, or how to treat it. That’s worse.

But given that I’m trying to calm down my stomach, I’ve decided to avoid any unnecessary stress. So when Scott Hatteberg committed two errors on one play with the bases loaded yesterday, I turned off the TV. I knew right then and there the A’s were going to get their butts kicked, and I didn’t need the aggravation.

I probably shouldn’t even watch any games at all this week, but that’s probably not going to happen. I’m rather addicted to this sport, and it’s hard to quit cold turkey.

Speaking of addictions, I hope that this article about amphetamines by Jeff Passan in the Kansas City Star is much ado about nothing, but I have questions.

Would any of the other players in that congressional hearing have gone into a Mark McGwire-like silent trance if they had been asked about greenies instead of just steroids?

How widespread is widespread? What percentage of Major League baseball players are addicted to amphetamines? What would happen to them if they were suddenly forced to stop taking them? Would they have withdrawal symptoms? Would their performances drop?

If clubhouses in the 90s had amphetamine-spiked coffee out in the open, the team doctors and management had to know about it, and tolerate it. Do they still tolerate amphetamines today? If not, when did they stop, and what prompted the change?

What if they only stopped this year, because of the steroid scandal? Would scoring go down? Or have pitchers popped greenies as much as hitters?

What if some teams stopped their tacit tolerance of amphetamines, and others didn’t? Would the performance of those teams suffer unfairly in comparison to others?

When Brian Anderson says about public perception, “we’re going to get slaughtered if the public buys into it,” should we buy into it?

When Bud Selig says, “It is time to put the whispers about amphetamine use to bed once and for all,” is he right? Is it time to cease our gossipy whispers, grab our torches and pitchforks, and come after these players with the shouts of an angry mob, hungry for the slaughter?

Or do we just let it slide, because thinking about it makes us sick to our stomachs?