Offseason Anagram Rap: Rangers
by Score Bard
2006-02-19 16:59

Yo, Toaster, Let’s Kick It!

All right stop, collaborate and listen
Old In Jeans has a brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me, trades just flow.
All chump playas just have to go.
No Grouchy Sin, Nor Green Sky,
Old In Jeans hits the bull in the eye,
Quick to the point, I’ll give you proof,
We gonna blow the Onion Salsa Roof,
If there was a problem, Yo, I’ll solve it,
Check us out: Vanilla Ice Dept.

Vanilla Ice Dept. Vanilla Ice Dept.
Vanilla Ice Dept. Vanilla Ice Dept.

Take heed, ’cause I’m a lyrical poet
We’re animal fierce in case you didn’t know it
Last year’s chumps were far too nice
Now Rangers got some Jeers Not Lice.
We add Mink Wool Devil, plus A Mean Toad,
Join Bearskin World, kick tail on the road,
I Abuse Rhinos, I Air A Skunk, Too.
Make the other team stink instead of you
After they lose, they’ll have Cried For Raccoons.
Now we Look Meaner, not a moment too soon.

If there was a problem, Yo, I’ll solve it,
Check us out: Vanilla Ice Dept.

Vanilla Ice Dept. Vanilla Ice Dept.
Vanilla Ice Dept. Vanilla Ice Dept.

Yo man — Let’s get out of here! Word to your mother.

40-man roster:

Pitchers B/T Ht Wt DOB
21 A Mean Toad R/R 6-2 190 11/23/77
73 Abort Fiasco L/L 5-8 150 01/20/85
58 Abuse Rhinos L/L 5-11 190 09/26/68
71 Anagram Goal Radar R/R 6-4 170 01/15/82
50 Coffin Car Snark R/R 6-2 220 09/11/79
31 Cried For Raccoons R/R 6-2 235 05/11/75
40 I Air A Skunk Too R/R 6-0 200 01/13/72
53 In Job Equation R/R 6-3 220 07/26/77
54 Immerse A Razor L/L 6-0 190 04/29/76
51 Jeers Not Lice R/R 6-3 230 02/07/79
36 Jowls, Inc. L/L 6-2 200 11/18/80
75 Labor Meter R/R 6-3 190 08/24/81
43 Look Meaner R/R 6-8 225 09/10/81
70 Lowliest Tent R/R 6-3 200 09/02/82
39 Men Told Facts L/R 6-5 210 02/07/83
33 Mink Wool Devil R/R 6-4 230 12/24/74
59 Posh Jure R/R 6-2 200 08/18/82
47 Shadow Jinn R/R 6-2 190 08/05/72
67 Solved One Quiz R/R 6-1 190 07/03/83
41 Uzi Jam Dungeon R/R 6-2 195 05/18/80
44 Vanilla Ice Dept. R/R 6-2 220 09/27/77
45 Yak Cried R/R 6-3 220 10/29/74
Catchers B/T Ht Wt DOB
27 Jars Abroad R/R 6-2 220 09/05/75
15 Ladder Grail R/R 6-2 220 11/03/79
Infielders B/T Ht Wt DOB
76 Admiral Isobar R/R 6-2 195 01/05/83
5 Alien Rinks R/R 6-0 175 06/22/82
9 Balk On Chalk L/R 6-1 200 11/21/80
25 Hi, Linen VP R/R 6-2 230 01/19/71
3 Joins Aquaria R/R 6-1 160 09/21/84
10 Lime Nacho Guy R/R 6-1 190 10/19/76
20 Mulch Dallas Glamor R/R 6-1 200 12/19/78
23 Rare Tiki Exam S/R 6-3 220 04/11/80
7 Road Makers R/R 6-1 205 02/26/75
Outfielders B/T Ht Wt DOB
22 Dead Dull Civic L/L 5-11 190 10/31/73
17 A Nice Lynx L/L 6-0 200 10/30/80
6 Bearskin World L/L 6-0 205 06/01/77
28 Hen Neck Vim R/R 6-0 225 01/07/78
30 Jots Batons S/R 6-5 250 07/26/80
14 Wham Strategy S/R 6-3 225 08/25/74
Comments: 3
1.   Ravenscar
2006-02-20 17:59

1.  I'm nominating this for the greatest baseball blog post in the history of the interweb.

2.   sasquatch
2006-02-21 13:05

2.  I bet that if the Phillies had known about Vanilla Ice Dept's musical talent, they wouldn't have traded him.

3.   anagramnut
2006-02-25 19:16

3.  I've been doing some anagrams myself, for my own enjoyment, and I was amused to see some exact matches (ABORT FIASCO, BEARSKIN WORLD), pleasantly surprised by some that I missed (VANILLA ICE DEPT., CRIED FOR RACCOONS), and somewhat puzzled by some omissions that I thought for sure I'd see here (SQUID LOVE ZONE, GAYEST WARMTH).

Comments on this post are closed.
This is Ken Arneson's blog about baseball, brains, art, science, technology, philosophy, poetry, politics and whatever else Ken Arneson feels like writing about
Original Sites
Recent Posts
Contact Ken
Mastodon

LinkedIn

Email: Replace the first of the two dots in this web site's domain name with an @.
Google Search
Web
Toaster
Ken Arneson
Archives
2021
01   

2020
10   09   08   07   06   05   
04   

2019
11   

2017
08   07   

2016
06   01   

2015
12   11   03   02   

2014
12   11   10   09   08   04   
03   01   

2013
12   10   08   07   06   05   
04   01   

2012
12   11   10   09   04   

2011
12   11   10   09   08   07   
04   02   01   

2010
10   09   06   01   

2009
12   02   01   

2008
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2007
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2006
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2005
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2004
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2003
12   11   10   09   08   07   
06   05   04   03   02   01   

2002
12   10   09   08   07   05   
04   03   02   01   

1995
05   04   02